wicked-angelic:

princeofkawaii-littleland:

deathtokillian:

Once I have top surgery I’m going to make up the weirdest stories for why I have scars on my chest.

~ I got attacked by this HUGE rat

~ Knife fight with a 4 year old

~ I don’t know man….It just happened

~What scars there’s nothing there

~ I had a dream about Freddy Krueger, and I woke up with these

~ Never skateboard while trying to knit

~ I sneezed too hard

~ Big Foot does not like to lose at poker

~ Elderly Bingo can get crazy man

~ Dragons are not as friendly as I thought

~ It’s just a cat scratch

~ Don’t fuck around with chopsticks

~ A pirate attacked me

~ just look down at your chest and scream

localcryptidsapphire:

life is short. play it wild. try new things. eat security cameras. make new friends.

the-tactician-of-ylisse:

you cannot convince me other wise 

machikono:

BIRD JUMPED ON THE KEYBOARD

AN d

WHERE AR ETHE MANNERS

queenrinacat:

brainstatic:

Everyone’s like “those Germans have a word for everything” but English has a word for tricking someone into watching the music video for Rick Astley’s Never Gonna Give You Up.

English has a lot more words created for very specific phenomena! It’s not just rick-rolling. Language is always evolving and it’s super interesting! Here’s a list of hyper-specific/untranslatable words in English.

carry-on-my-wayward-butt:

me: hey lemme see ur phone I’ll put my number in

unsuspecting fool: hahah sure *hands me his phone*

me: *transfers his entire Pokemon Go team to myself*

fool: what the fuck?

me: *rips my jacket open to reveal a sensible tee with a large bedazzled letter R* TO PROTECT THE WORLD FROM DEVISTA–

spitblaze:

Thank you but why the absolute fuck would I want that

First of all, HECK YEAH SHADOWS OF ALMIA! Secondly, I have actually asked for a glass of hot water at a restaurant before. It was outdoors and it was like forty degrees (fahrenheit) outside. They literally brought me a steaming glass of water so hot I couldn’t even drink it until it was almost time to leave. It was wonderful.

dryeguy:

bluebiesartblog:

the-husbando:

twilightown:

CAUSE EVERY TIME WE TOUCH I GET THIS FEELING

EVERY TIME WE KISS I SWEAR I COULD FLY

CAN’T U FEEL MY HEART BEAT FAST, I WANT THIS TO LAST

NEED YOU BY MY SIDE

This is the closest gif that can really capture the utter chaotic energy that is released when people hear this song

@dryeguy @kissthethunder

I hate that I can audibly hear this…

jiveturkeyjerky:

I love the guy who’s clearly a teacher who came over with the intent to tear two fucking idiot teenagers apart from each other only to find these fucking nerds it probably made his entire month

one-time-i-dreamt:

wisdomsblogs:

rubylipz:

symbioticsnake:

one-time-i-dreamt:

My roommate and I were in the car, driving to buy something to drink, and we were moving across an icy road with a river on both sides. We were arguing about what to get, she wanted water and I wanted a different drink, when all of a sudden her car slipped on the ice and we went straight into the river and sunk to the bottom. I turned to her while we were sinking and just said, “There’s your fuckin’ water.”

Someone draw this

my hand slipped…

The car ALSO slipped

TOO SOON